Day 3: 100 Days of Intentional Kindness

April 4th

Day 3: I made time for a friend- This is one we can all relate to, on both sides of the situation. A new friend of mine had been reaching out to me, several times, to get together. Each time, I had to turn down the invite. Not because I was trying to avoid time with him, but because I always felt too busy to get away. Between my day job, launching and being determined to make a success of my new non-profit, and having my 5 year old niece 50% of the time, I always have an endless list of "to-do's". As much as I want a social life and to continue dating (so I can find my person and stop dating), I haven't been so good at finding that happy balance. I either do nothing but focus on my to-do list, which makes me feel accomplished (even if it's only for a day) but then feel lame for not having done anything fun. I can partly blame my funds being tight too. Being social takes money, but so does bank-rolling a non-profit. The non-profit has been winning that battle. I'm still searching for regular donors, it's not a strength of mine. Or If I plan a social butterfly schedule, I usually always have fun but feel guilty for not getting enough done and the strain on my budget. My social anxiety is a big decision maker on my home-body ruts, as well. So it's a work in progress. I have decided, mentally, I just need to embrace allowing myself to do both and be OK with it. 

Luckily, with the 100 days of kindness, I'm constantly thinking of ways to make others in my life feel that they matter. I recognized I have turned my friend down way too many times in the last week. I always had a good excuse but the problem with saying no, is if you do it too often, people stop asking. The thing is, I don't want my friends to stop asking! Actually, there is too many times I see friends on Facebook doing something and get that left out feeling. I hate that feeling! So I decided I needed to make time. I realized I didn't have a lunch meeting and I could invite him out for lunch. When he said he was free and we made the plans, it actually felt nice to know I was going to have to break myself away from my laptop for a little while and actually get food for lunch. Besides a location mix-up, it was fun! I learned many cool things I didn't know before. Plus we took advantage of the nice weather and went for a short walk outside. Nature is good for the soul, right? Eventually, I had to get back to the laptop but I did notice a less stressed feeling about myself. Plus, focusing on different thoughts and conversations helped me reset my work priorities. I initially reached out to my friend and set time aside to make sure he knew I cared but in the end, I came out better too.